An SNL Christmas

I guess it's that time of year again, when the wildly hit-or-miss Saturday Night Live tries to knock a Christmas song or skit out of the park, sometimes with success and others just a swing-and-a-miss.

This year's offering, which features Katy Perry, is probably a triple:



My all-time favorites from "recent" memory, though, are the following. First is Christmastime for the Jews:



Followed by the annoyingly catchy Santa's My Boyfriend:



I'll leave it to you to go find the Schweddy Balls skit.

UPDATE:
It just occurred to me that this is becoming an annual tradition. Well, at least the one with Katy Perry, Matt Damon (just saw him in The Adjustment Bureau two days ago, which wasn't half bad), and Val Kilmer is new.

Another annual tradition? Checking for snow in Hawaii.

...

New and improved fruitcake

Today, December 27, is apparently National Fruitcake Day (and just in time for the repeal of Don't Ask Don't Tell — rimshot!). And in honor of today being National Fruitcake Day, all of today's stories will be written in fruitcake.

Okay. Obviously Kushibo did not get a sophisticated sense of humor for Christmas. But the National Fruitcake Day angle has an interesting twist to it: Korean bakers are introducing Korean-style fruitcake into the mix of doorstop-like blocks of dried fruit in a heavy cake.

From the Orange County Register:

There are at least two options for your Fruitcake Day festivities, and they both landed on our shore in 1985.

Your first option is for those of us (OK, the majority of people) who don't dig the sticky several-pound mass of dried fruit and nuts bought in round tins printed with holiday pictures.

Friends, we give you the Korean fruit cake, a delightful dish of sponge cake, custard and fresh fruit, layered up on a platter and covered with whipped crème. It's like the gussied-up, grown-up version of strawberry shortcake, with the addition of pineapple, kiwi and mandarin oranges.

At the Manmi Bakery in Garden Grove, Anna Yi sells two sizes, at $18 or $25. The cake is not specifically designed for Christmas, but rather for special occasions, like birthdays, she said.

"Each store has different kinds," Yi said. "Ours is more like an American-style. Other bakeries have a French style."

The French style has more fruit inside, but just a bit of fruit on the top of the cake, looking more like a Western-style cake, she said.

The cakes are not traditionally Korean, said Sejung Kim, assistant director of the UCLA Center for Korean Studies. The cakes grew popular in Korea in the 1980s, when people fell in love with the whipped cream icing, she said.

The story goes on to describe steam-baked Butterfield farm cakes, which sound really appetizing. When I'm back in OC, shall probably check out both. I've never been a big fan of Korean-style bakeries, some of which have dry and bland cookies and cakes, but I do like the moist, custard-filled cakes you find.

Now Manmi says they don't sell these as Christmas cakes per se, but back in Korea (and Japan and much of the rest of East Asia) this is exactly what people buy for Christmas (what some say is part of the destruction of Christmas in places like South Korea or Japan, where its newfound character as a second Valentine's Day has derisively earned it the nickname Sexmas... a pun that works in Japanese and Korean if you replace the Chinese character for 성/せい, meaning holy, with its homophonous counterpart meaning sex: 聖誕祭 replaced by 性誕祭, if I'm putting that together properly).

Back in the 1990s, there was one of those social commentaries that likened people to some person or object in order to illustrate a point. In this case it was women as Christmas cakes, with the date in December corresponding to their age. Around the 22nd or 23rd, it may be a little early but some people are buying the Christmas cake (bear in mind that this is Korean age, so we're talking 20 to 22). Around the 24th, lots of people are buying. By the 25th, that's the Christmas cake's last chance to be bought, because no one buys a Christmas cake from the 26th on. Yes, that's why a lot of women felt freaked out about being an old maid by the age of twenty-five, with many of them rushing off into a marriage to the least worst guy they could find.

I say women are like New Year's cakes... [Kushibo ducks]

Midnight mass at Honolulu'sCathedral of Our Lady of Peace

Instead of a local church, it was decided we should go downtown to Honolulu's Cathedral of Our Lady of Peace. Apparently a lot of people had gotten there earlier to enjoy Christmas carols, and that meant we were forced into the nosebleed seats. Many of those who got there before us were Christmas-and-Easter Christians, so it was packed.

The upper floors were actually a better way to view this church built in 1864. And they still brought us crackers and wine for the eucharist. At 1 a.m., though, I didn't feel entirely comfortable walking back to the car, which was on a deserted street that during the daytime would be bustling with activity.

On the day part of Christmas Day, I might take a cue from "Christmastime for the Jews" (the above video) and have dim sum in Chinatown. After that, I'll take in a movie (which is a Christmas tradition in the Kushibo abode).

And speaking of musically-themed Saturday Night Live sketches, here's another favorite:

Ah, what the heck... Let's throw in some Schweddy Balls:

And while we're at it, Happy Chanukah. That's both a three-weeks-late greeting for this year, and a fifty-two-week-early greeting for next year, when the holiday will actually run through Christmas like it should.

Finally, for some of homegrown Christmas satire from the K-blogosphere, check out ChickenHead's "T'was the Night Before Christmas on the DMZ."

And a Mele Kalikimaka to all!

Because the manger was not listed as a standard housing unit 
or abode, Mary, Joseph, and their new baby were undercounted. 
The City of Bethlehem, noting such shoddy work was endemic 
for Census0000, sued the Roman Empire for greater 
representation in the Senate, but they were unsuccessful.

It's still Christmas Eve here in the Aloha State, and I'm still working on end-of-semester stuff and I'm stuck in Honolulu (plus my MacBook Pro is giving me rare headaches — and rare headaches are often huge headaches), so I thought I'd post some links to past Christmas-themed posts.

• My first-ever Christmas post, from 2005, which included the above picture of a Korean-themed Nativity and a brief explanation of why Christianity took off as it did in Korea.

• My Christmas post from 2008, which includes a very snowy Big Island. I'm not sure, but I think NORAD tracks Santa from there (also in 3-D).

• Here's hoping for a white Christmas in Hawaii again this year (the picture at right is Mauna Kea right this moment). It's 80°F here on Oahu, at least in California it's chilly enough to feel like Christmas.

• Don't care much for gingerbread-flavored lattes at Starbucks.

• Somewhere in Kim Jong-il's plot to take down South Korea's giant "Christmas tree" at Aegibong is the plot to Team America 2. 

• We've been celebrating Christmas since October here in Honolulu.

• Story #6 from last Christmas: North Koreans detain "obese, jocular deer herder" who crosses Tuman River.

Sometime after Christmas I may write up about a conversation I had with "M," who is a Japanese Catholic, and her disgust that the birth of Christ has become a day for couples to get laid. Anyone in South Korea knows that Christmas for non-Christians (Catholics and Protestants alike) has morphed into a second Valentine's Day (making it hard to get reservations at restaurants and hotels in Seoul as well), so the idea may be familiar. 

Feliz Navidad, Buon Natale, and Merry Christmas to all!

UPDATE:
Roboseyo has two videos that, I think, can really make your Christmas Day. Their only downside is that they're both too short.

Daily Kor for December 22, 2010: National Haiku Day

Daily Kor's back! (At least for today... and hopefully in January.) And in honor of today being National Haiku Day (in the US that is; every day is Haiku Day in Japan), all of today's stories will be presented in haiku. This is an annual tradition here at MIaaP (and I'm writing this intro way ahead of time), so I apologize in advance if it appears I'm treating any of the following stories in a glib manner. It's on the menu and I'm sticking to it no matter what.

Gov'nuh Richardson
travels to North Korea
Will there be more talks?
(AP via WaPo, CNN)

Pyongyang plays chicken
but stubborn Seoul* carries on
In the end, nothing.
(NYT, Reuters, China News Asia, CNN, Chosun Ilbo)
* In Korean 서울 is two syllables, but here in English it's typically one.

A merry Christmas
is not for North Koreans
"Take down Christmas tree!"
(UPI, AP via WaPo, WSJ, Bloomberg, Yonhap, Joongang Daily)

Nothing has happened
So relieved are investors
Asian stocks again climb
(AP via WaPo, WSJ, Bloomberg)

A fishing boat costs
a lot to Chinese people
"We rammed but you pay!"
(WSJ, Bloomberg)

You shelled our island!
We can't forgive such actions!
We've become Marines!
(Bloomberg)

Nuclear weapons
in the hands of a rogue state
Even China worries
(Reuters)

Park is a has-been?
His best years are behind him?
Not so, says Japan
(Yonhap)

A challenging task

writing all news in haiku

Glad it's once a year

White Christmas in Hawaii?

Two days ago there were flash flood warnings on Kauai. And then yesterday it rained something fierce here in Oahu. As that wet weather made its way southeastward, it dumped a whole bunch of snow on both Mauna Kea and Mauna Loa, the two volcanic peaks reaching 13,796 and 13,679 feet respectively (just over and under 4200 meters) that form the Island of Hawaii, the US's largest island.

This view of Mauna Kea from the National Oceanic and 
Atmospheric Adminstration webcam on top of Mauna Loa 
shows snow on both Big Island mountains this morning. 
A winter storm that moved past the islands overnight 
left several inches of snow on Hawaii's highest peaks.

It's kinda pretty, and if it sticks around, I may be tempted to head back to the Big Island come Christmas (I was there in May), just for the novelty of enjoying a white Christmas in the Aloha State. (Kushibo is too busy with school-related responsibilities to make it to California or Seoul this holiday.)

Merry Christmas from Walmart! (in October)Korean title: 10월의 크리스마스

I spotted these artificial Christmas trees while looking for Halloween costumes.

Now if you'll excuse me, I'm off to the Capitol to take part in the Take Back The Insanity rally or whatever it's called.

A oégugin Chusok

If you have no family in Korea to whose home you must travel, I guess this is as good a way to spend your Chusok holiday as any:



I actually quite enjoyed that, but I happen to have a blonde-girl-dancing-in-pink-unicorn-costume fetish.

My all-time favorite this-major-holiday-isn't-for-us video, however, is "Christmastime for the Jews" from Saturday Night Live:

Daily Kor for December 25, 2009: Peacekeeping on Earth, bad will beyond the Tumen

I dozed off while tracking Santa via NORAD, so this is me getting up the next morning to finish the news report I should have done about seven or eight hours ago. Nothing has actually changed: Japanese textbooks are still removing the claim to Tokto but speaking euphemistically about territorial claims (which, to be fair, includes things other than Tokto). A step in the right direction for good relations, I suppose. And other stuff, too, but none of it really comes together for a Yuletide theme.

1. In absence of direct mention of Tokto but a general description that Japanese students understand territorial problems, Seoul reiterates its position that there is no territorial dispute with Tokyo (Xinhua)
2. Crew of plane carrying tons of North Korean weapons detained for at least twelve more days (ABC, WSJ, AP via WaPo)
3. National Assembly passes bill allowing for quick deployment of ROK troops for UN peacekeeping operations (Korea Times)
4. Korea Institute for Defense Analyses believes North Korea could conduct a third nuclear test (AP via WaPo, Yonhap)
5. South Korea is considering a cap-and-trade scheme to control greenhouse gases (Yonhap)
6. North Korean authorities detain "obese, jocular" deer herder crossing Tuman River (Yonhap)

• Finnish embassy in Pyongyang demands to see prisoner (AFP)
• Confiscated goods include DVDs, MP3 players, and extensive list of contacts (AP via WaPo)
• KCNA releases Dear Leader's favorite venison recipes (Xinhua)

Buon Natale! Merry Christmas!

Merry Christmas! 메리 크리스마스!
And a belated happy Hanukkah!



Here's wishing you and yours a joyous holiday season. And for those of us in Seoul, enjoy the semi-white Christmas.

And last, but not least, for the US military personnel who find themselves thousands of miles away from loved ones while serving in the Middle East, Afghanistan, Korea, Okinawa, mainland Japan, Europe, out at sea, or anywhere else in the world, here's a heart-felt word of thanks this holiday season for your sacrifice and your courage.

For you, a small tribute in the form of a Korean Christmas past:


From this website of Paul Noll:

After we left Taejon we went to Taegu and camped there for a while. On Christmas day we had a Christmas feast with Turkey, dressing, sweet potatoes, pumpkin pie, mashed potatoes, green beans, nuts, cake, celery, cranberry sauce, eggnog, milk, coffee, and other things I have forgotten about.

Tears come to my eyes as I write and think about that wonderful Christmas and the effort the army went to, to make it feel a little bit more like home. The officers served the dinner.

My team had a Christmas tree about 7 inches high and we sang songs and thought of Christmases long ago home with our families.

We wondered about our families and how they might be worrying about us here. We wrote home often but mail was hard to get and send. I did get one package from my brother Mark. It was, so help me, a box of handkerchiefs. I kidded him about that when I got home.

Some of the group got packages of cookies, cheeses or salami. Whenever anyone got something it was always gratefully shared with others in the team. We grew to trust and depend on each other very much. This was one of the few times we spent as a company together. Soon after my team went off to set up a station.

God bless you all!