Stewart skewers Dennis Rodman on North Korea visit

In his characteristic sarcastic style, Jon Stewart last night lampooned Dennis "The Worm" Rodman for being a clueless tool of Kim Jong-un, while simultaneously mocking former Republican presidential candidate Mitt Romney for being a clueless rich guy who doesn't understand why he lost the election.

Oh, and Venezuelan leader Hugo Chavez is dead, a fact that would have given former North Korean leader Kim Jong-il pause and a chance to reflect on his own mortality, were he not already dead for nearly a year a half.

Nevertheless, Dear Leader, a belated happy birthday.

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And NONE of them are Korean...

Clockwise, from bottom:
Mitt Romney, Mrs Romney,
Rick Santorum, the American
electorate, Ron Paul.

If I were to write a serious version of the hit 1990s NBC comedy Third Rock From the Sun, the character of Dick Solomon, the intelligent alien leader who is hopelessly clueless about normal life on Earth, would seem a lot like Mitt Romney.

Outwardly he seems like a normal human being, but if you talk with him just a little bit you can see he's not one of us: his awkward use of descriptive sentences when he doesn't know common words is an indicator that he's a visitor to the world of the common man and isn't familiar with the familiar, while he boasts of engaging in things that most people would find kinda sorta appalling.

Like transporting your dog in a small kennel strapped to the top of the car and insisting that Mitt's mutt loved it. Or expressing glee about firing people. Or bragging of how many personal vehicles one has. You've no doubt heard this list.

The dog thing really seemed cringeworthy (that word does not trigger the spellcheck!) to a lot of people, making them wonder if he's kinda sorta lacking compassion for humans or canines.

The story has legs. Months later, people are still talking about it, and that has prompted the Romney campaign to react by making President Obama seem like an even worse offender in the eyes of people who bought Marley & Me on DVD.

And what could that be? President Barack Hussein Obama, the guy with the funny name whose father was from a strange country and who grew up in a different strange country and attended a madrassa, has eaten dog:

The Romney campaign signaled Tuesday night that they are not about to cede any ground when it comes to a candidate’s odd past with man’s best friend.

And the Obama campaign shot back, with a spokesman suggesting the Romney team was attacking a child, since the Obama act in question took place when he was a kid.

The Daily Caller noted that in President Obama’s best-selling memoir, “Dreams from My Father: A Story of Race and Inheritance,” the president recalls being fed dog meat as a young boy in Indonesia with his stepfather, Lolo Soetoro.

“With Lolo, I learned how to eat small green chill peppers raw with dinner (plenty of rice), and, away from the dinner table, I was introduced to dog meat (tough), snake meat (tougher), and roasted grasshopper (crunchy),” the president wrote. “Like many Indonesians, Lolo followed a brand of Islam that could make room for the remnants of more ancient animist and Hindu faiths. He explained that a man took on the powers of whatever he ate: One day soon, he promised, he would bring home a piece of tiger meat for us to share.”

After his mother married Soetoro, Obama lived in Indonesia from 1967 until 1971, from roughly the age of 6 through 10.

The discovery that the president had eaten dog meat prompted wise-cracks on twitter (hashtag — #ObamaDogRecipes) and this tweet from Romney strategist Eric Fehrstrom, who re-tweeted Axelrod’s original message with a different take on the picture of the president and Bo.

“@EricFehrn: In hindsight, a chilling photo,” he wrote.

Obama campaign spokesman Ben LaBolt tweeted in response: “@BenLaBolt What’s the next attack @EricFerhn and the RNC will surface on a 6-10 year old?”

Democrats and supporters of the president’s forcefully took to twitter Tuesday night and Wednesday morning to challenge the notion that Obama as a boy eating food given to him by his stepfather could be compared to actions Romney took as an adult. Republicans pushed back, saying that the dog-eating tale underlines how any discussion of dogs at a time of massive unemployment, with troops in harm’s way, is silly.

I have to agree with the Democratic operatives that there is something ridiculous about comparing Romney's own deliberate acts as an adult to those of a kid being fed something over which he had no control. I mean, one was thirty-seven and the other was seven.

[source]

This reminds me of George W. Bush's felony drunk driving conviction, which he tried to brush off as a "youthful indiscretion" even though he was older than I was. That's right: our actions as an adult tell us a lot more about our impulses, drives, flaws, and convictions much more than what was thrust upon us as children.

Anyway, I wonder if Obama's elementary school eating experiences will gain any traction. Already some are suggesting that it is proof he's not a real American:

I don't know ANY natural born American boy who would ever eat Spot, even if coerced by his mooslim stepfather. Thanks for the further proof that Barry ain't really an American. Eatin' dogs ain't an American value. Hell, he acts like he's proud he did it! Where's the regret?

That's an argument that would hardly hold up in court (right here is a natural born American from Long Island who loves himself some dog meat — as an adult) but it might hold sway in the ballot box. But I think those who already loathe President B. Hussein Obama are the only ones really expressing outrage at a kid being "introduced to dog meat" in another country. Heck, I might go back to Korea and eat some dog meat on principle! (While wearing my hoodie, if that's still a thing.)

Anyway, if this story does take off, the association of some East Asian country with canine cuisine might shift from Korea to Indonesia. Here's hoping.

This one's a keeper.

UPDATE:
Over at the Marmot's Hole (I'm all about K-blog cross-pollination), there's a discussion on the recent discovery of a Mad Cow case in America, which includes mention of Obama's youthful canophagic proclivities, including this video:




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Romney wins in Puerto Rico... Could this be a harbinger of a Romney-Fortuño ticket?

Congratulations to former Massachusetts governor and Obamacare inspiration Mitt Romney for winning the delegates from a territory that doesn't actually have an electoral voice in the November election! (Actually, despite that little bit of snark, I think it's great that the two major parties include Puerto Rico, the US Virgin Islands, American Samoa, the Commonwealth of the Northern Mariana Islands, and Guam in the primaries.)

This got me wondering out loud again about the prospect, which I touted last summer (here and here), of Romney (if he wins the nomination) having Puerto Rico's GOP governor Luis Fortuño as a running mate. He's an intelligent leader, he meets all the criteria, and having a Hispanic on the ticket might tip the race in a lot of swing states and maybe even give the Democrats a run for their money in New York, where hundreds of thousands (millions?) of ethnic Puerto Ricans reside.

(I would suggest that Rick Santorum do the same, but he said he's not willing to have any Puerto Ricans on his ticket until they learn English. I kid! I kid! I kid because I love... to kid!)

Tapping Governor Fortuño might be a better move, strategically, than what the Ron Paul camp may have up their sleeves. Having not come in first in any race so far, the libertarian darling is angling to have himself or his son (US senator from Kentucky Rand Paul) in the VP slot of the Romney ticket.

This would bolster the conservative credentials of Mitt Romney in the eyes of Tea Partiers (or rather, counter the liberal credentials they perceive him to have) and prevent a lot of them from sitting out in November 2012 because they are loath to vote for a RINO (Republican in name only).

Ron Paul serves a useful purpose as the conservative conscience of a country that has been spending too much since the Reagan era (minus a few years of Clinton), but he is too naïvely simple and obstinate to handle complex issues, be they domestic or foreign. The idea of him a heartbeat away from the presidency is downright frightening (we probably wouldn't start any wars, but he'd be leaving a geopolitical mess for whomever comes after him). I'm not sure how many of his father's ideas Rand Paul shares, but if he's got more than half of them, no thank you.

I never really got the whole idea of the Ron Paul Revolution signs. I mean, the guy doesn't stand for love; he stands for standing on your own. I guess some might see that as tough love. As in, "You got problems? Tough!" Also, the whole LOVE spelling backward thing to fit in with the revolution wording is kinda creepy and a tad scary. I mean, in addition to advocating revolution (nothing like killing people so we can have the freedom to not buy health insurance! Woo hoo!), I remember learning that love spelled backwards sounds like evil. Really, did these people not run this by anyone other than fellow Paulbaggers? 

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A Mitt of the people

With Mitt Romney stepping in it with $10,000 bets, giddy proclamations that he enjoys firing people, announcements that he doesn't really care about the very poor, and revelations of Swiss and Cayman Island bank accounts, there are concerns that not only does Mittens fail to connect with the average Joe and Jane, but that Joe and Jane may not want to connect to him come November. And thus we can imagine this kind of discussion at the Vote Mitt 2012 headquarters:

AIDE: 
Sir, you are having trouble convincing average Americans who have been dealt a body blow by the economy and the housing crisis that you actually understand the problems they're facing and how to solve them. What you need to do is get out there and spend time with someone like them. You know, some aging, fat bald guy who knows the pain of bankruptcy.

MITT:
I know just the guy!

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Meet El Presidente

The Los Angeles Times mentions a discussion Mitt Romney has had with a TV anchor for Univision, the Spanish-language television network that is ripping our social fabric to shreds is the largest Spanish-langauge network in los Estados Unidos.

Apparently the suggestion was made that because his father was born in Mexico, that might make Mitt Romney the first Mexican-American to win the White House.

George Romney -- auto company president, Michigan governor and 1968 Republican presidential aspirant -- was, in fact, born in Mexico, where his parents lived in a Mormon community.

Jorge Ramos, a Univision TV anchor, asked if that could allow his son to claim that he’s of Mexican American descent and possibly become the first Hispanic president.

Romney, who doesn’t speak Spanish, indicated that he’d be very pleased if that idea got spread around ahead of Tuesday’s primary in Florida. About one-tenth of the Republican vote is expected to be cast by Latinos, mainly Cuban Americans, Puerto Ricans and a smattering of immigrants from Central and South America.

“I would love to be able to convince people of that, particularly in a Florida primary,” Romney said, with a chuckle, during the interview in Miami, a Cuban American stronghold.

“But I think that might be disingenuous on my part,” he added.

If all this were true, that would make him part of the Juan Percent. [rim shot]

Others might say he's definitely a Mexican't, and a bit of a Felipe-flopper.

I'm here all week!

(The title is from a Duran Duran song, circa the Pleistocene Era)



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Huntsman has left the building

My favorite GOP candidate for president, former Utah governor Jon Huntsman, has decided to call it quits.

I am terribly disappointed by this. Governor Huntsman was by far my favorite, even if I don't agree with all his views. First of all, he did actually attempt health care reform, which is a far cry from the rest of the field, who just whine about Obamacare without acknowledging that their party has done nothing real to deal with this issue after killing Hillarycare back in the mid-1990s. (Former Massachusetts governor Mitt Romney is an exception to this, of course, but in order to appeal to the far right, he's running on a platform of killing the same Obamacare that is modeled after his own Romneycare.)



Governor Huntsman also has shown not only that he can work with the other side (he was President Obama's ambassador to China) but also that he sees tremendous value in doing so. His quick response to Mitt Romney's absurd criticism of Huntsman for working with Obama was laudatory and downright inspiring: Romney's attitude of party over country is precisely what is wrong with this country (he says as much at about 1:20 or 1:30 in the above video).

In case you missed what I'm talking about, here's a post-debate piece from just before the New Hampshire primary:

Huntsman: “I was criticized last night by Governor Romney for putting my country first … He criticized me while he was out raising money for serving my country in China. Yes, under a Democrat. Like my two sons are doing in the United States Navy. They're not asking what political affiliation the president is. I want to be very clear with the people here in New Hampshire and this country: I will always put my country first.”

Here was Romney’s response: “I think we serve our country first by standing for people who believe in conservative principles and doing everything in our power to promote an agenda that does not include President Obama's agenda.”

Huntsman’s invocation of his two sons serving in the military is an essential reminder of a bedrock American tradition: our servicemen and women do not make their service contingent on the political persuasion of the president. That’s because they are patriots first, not partisans. Huntsman deserved the applause he received for that line.

Romney’s response seems to me at least as remarkable: “I think we serve our country first by standing for people who believe in conservative principles …” That is the opposite of John McCain’s 2008 campaign slogan, “Country First.” Romney’s answer is “Party First,” “Ideology First.”

But the right wing that has a chokehold on the Republican Party today has been fed so much red meat that they see that as weak, socialist, and un-American, among other things.

Like I said, I don't agree with everything Huntsman stands for, but neither do I feel the same about Obama. But with the exit of Huntsman, we're down to few or no candidates who I would feel comfortable with as president for the next four to eight years. In fact, the most disappointing thing about this is that Huntsman turned around and endorsed Romney, whose flip-flopping and running away from the best part of his record in order to pander to the right makes him a lousy choice for president.

The only good I can see from that move is the possibility that he might be picked as a running mate for Romney, but with the Religious Right being so concerned about Romney's Mormonism, I don't see Mitt doubling down on what is a major source of concern among many conservative voters.

This is terribly disappointing. He was by far my favorite, in part because (a) he actually attempted health care reform in his state and (b) he saw the value in going across the aisle to make things work.

Right now, if I were to have to choose someone to vote for, I guess I'd pick Newt Gingrich, mainly because he has shown, during the Clinton years, that he is able to hammer out important deals with the Democrats that get the country back on track. Pragmatism and country before ideology, at least on the budget deficit and the national debt (not so much on health care).

Frankly, though, Huntsman was the last truly electable candidate running. Mitt Romney faces an uphill battle with his own party because of his past support for universal health care, his Mormonism, and lately his history of laying off people. Gingrich faces an uphill battle with non-conservatives due to his abrasiveness and his history of infidelity (hypocritical infidelity, no less). Ron Paul has some great ideas but is a simplistic kook on others. Though he demonstrates flexibility over ideology, Rick Santorum holds tight to homophobic views that are at odds with independent and Democratic voters, while his own record of political advantage-making will likely come back to haunt him in the general election.

Well, there's still Gary Johnson, a former governor of New Mexico who was wildly popular with Republicans and Democrats with viable positions on a number of issues. Inexplicably and inexcusably, Governor Johnson has been excluded from all the Republican debates, as if he is not a serious candidate and as if he is not even running. In all seriousness, this is an absolute travesty of our democratic system. Perhaps he wasn't invited because he stands for drug legalization and believes same-sex marriage should be allowed, but is this all that different from Ron Paul?

If you find yourself flirting with some of Ron Paul's more sensible ideas but you're turned off by his wackiness on others, go check out Gary Johnson. With Huntsman gone, he's my next favorite candidate.

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Mitt the Ripper

Being one of those people who was appalled by the Citizens United decision long before Obama told me I should be, I absolutely love the way Stephen Colbert and Jon Stewart have been edumacating the viewing public on what a threat to our democracy it is when we have unfettered cash pouring into our electoral process.

It's bonus points when they make hilarious things like this:

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"If corporations are people, then Mitt Romney is a serial killer." Gotta love it.

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