Monster Island (actually a peninsula)*

Pearls of witticism from 'Bo the Blogger: Kushibo's Korea blog... Kushibo-e Kibun... Now with Less kimchi, more nunchi. Random thoughts and commentary (and indiscernibly opaque humor) about selected social, political, economic, and health-related issues of the day affecting "foreans," Koreans, Korea and East Asia, along with the US, especially Hawaii, Orange County and the rest of California, plus anything else that is deemed worthy of discussion. Forza Corea!

Saturday, May 7, 2011

Batting 0.20

Are there any well-known Korean celebrities in America who don't get arrested for DUI?

Our latest (the last one I can actually remember is Daniel Dae Kim, here in Hawaii back when "Lost" was still on the air, so maybe I'm exaggerating the frequency in my head) is Cleveland Indians star Choo Shin-soo.

The newscaster says that Mr Choo was confused about his left and right during the sobriety test but, um, that's not so uncommon for many Korean learners of English. God help us if every Korean tourist to America gets accused of being drunk because they can't follow the directions the cop is giving them (or because their paused English makes them sound inebriated).

Mr Choo apparently also thought an arrest — his blood alcohol level was 0.20, four times what it is in South Korea and 2.5 times what it is in Ohio — would mean deportation.

His arrest is only the latest involving a Big League baseball player, and this has prompted Major League Baseball to look into whether they should be doing something about this:

Major League Baseball and the MLB Players Association reportedly have discussed implementing an alcohol policy as part of the new Collective Bargaining Agreement currently being negotiated.

Six Major League players have been arrested for allegedly drinking and driving this calendar year -- including two in recent weeks. While those incidents have brought the issue to the forefront, several reports this week suggest a program to address problems with alcohol abuse has been a discussion point between MLB and the union for some time now.

Currently, there is no specific system of punishment from the league if a player is arrested for driving under the influence one or more times, nor is there a league-operated treatment program for alcohol abuse.

Anyone who knows me knows I have a deep-seated hatred of drunk drivers. It only angers me more when celebrities are let off the hook in part because they are famous. I don't know what will happen, but if Mr Choo somehow gets off with a slap on the wrist for driving with a 0.20% BAL, I hope he realizes he needs rehab and/or a chauffeur.

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Ask Kushibo.

My Google/Blogspot data shows that a lot of the 2 million people who have landed on my site (yes, that's the real number) are looking for cultural information on Korea (e.g., “When did Syngman Rhee die?” “What did the Indians bring to the first Chusŏk?’ etc., etc.), as well as practical or historical stuff.

That got me thinking that, hey, I have a master’s degree in Korean studies and a minor in Japanese studies, I’ve lived in Seoul far longer than most foreans my age (whether they're kyopo or non-kyopo), I teach introductory courses on Korea and its cultural trappings and history, so why not offer a free service where I attempt to answer people’s questions, point them in the direction of where they can get them answered, and/or offer my regulars (that’s you!) a chance to take a stab at some of this stuff, too.

So if there’s something you’d like to know from a “contrarian scourge,” click on ASK KUSHIBO and just ask a succinct question in the comments section below.

Oh, and play nice. Please don’t make me regret this.

九十五大怪獣란? 쿠시보의 몬스터 아일랜드란?

Pearls of witticism from 'Bo the Blogger: Kushibo's Korea blog... Kushibo-e Kibun...
Now with Less kimchi, more nunchi. Random thoughts and commentary (and indiscernibly opaque humor) about selected social, political, economic, and health-related issues of the day affecting "foreans" ("foreigners" in Korea be they kyopo or non-kyopo), Koreans, Korea and East Asia, along with the US, especially Hawaii, Orange County, and the rest of California, plus anything else that is deemed worthy of discussion. Forza Corea!

* Monster Island (actually a peninsula)

The name of this blog comes from a line in "Lisa on Ice," a beloved episode of The Simpsons, perhaps my all-time favorite television show (even though for several seasons there, it really did suck). Lisa is imagining being sworn in as president, but at the last minute, it is discovered that she failed P.E. (physical education) and she is thus "sentenced to a lifetime of horror" on Monster Island. "Don't worry," the Chief Justice of the Supreme Court confides in her, "It's just a name."

Fast forward to Lisa and other prisoners running in panic through a tropical jungle, chased by Godzilla-like creatures, including a monster turtle and a monster firefly.

"He said it was just a name!" Lisa screams to the man next to her. While he, too, runs for his life, the unidentified man calmly says, "What he meant is that Monster Island is actually a peninsula."

Anyway, I thought in some ways that punchline summed up modern-day Korea in a nutshell. For many people—foreigners and Koreans—the ups and downs and everyday travails of the Republic of Korea make it as precarious as a Monster Island would be (and with the DMZ being the only land border, it really is like an island). But it actually is a peninsula. Okay, it made sense in my head.

So as you can see, despite the hits I get from people looking for Japanese tentacle porn, it has nothing to do with anything salacious as that.

Monster Island (actually a peninsula)*

Saturday, May 7, 2011

Batting 0.20

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