Wednesday, July 22, 2009

MMA fighter fakes death to avoid community service

Well, that's what this article from the Orange County Register seems to be saying about Ultimate Fighting Championship star Kimo Leopoldo, who has been reported dead from a heart attack at the age of forty-one:
On the same day of his reported death, Leopoldo was sentenced to 10 days of community service and mandatory participation in a drug diversion program, stemming from a February arrest in Tustin for possession of marijuana while wearing a Long Beach police officer jumpsuit.

Two plainclothes detectives found Leopoldo in a Tustin parking lot dressed in the suit, playing with a yo-yo and leaning against a car in which he had been a passenger.

Leopoldo was waiting for the driver of the car who went into a pharmacy, defense attorney Victor Hobbs said.

The woman who owned the car disappeared after seeing police outside of the pharmacy.

Detectives then searched the vehicle and found a pipe and a small amount of marijuana.
If you're going to impersonate a cop — and I can't emphasize this enough — lose the effin' yo-yo. Cops hate yo-yos. Everybody knows that!

Anyway, Kimo's plan was as simple as it was brilliant: Fake his death, avoid that pesky ten days of community service and the drug diversion program, and watch on the telly one's Michael Jackson-esque funeral and life celebration, replete with weeping fans, before heading down to a retiree village in Baja California's seaside town of San Felipe to live out one's life under the assumed name of Juanito Burns. At least, that's what I assume he's plotting.

[Note: While there is no Korea connection to this story, Leopoldo's first name is Kim, and the guy has lived in both Orange County and Hawaii, which makes a Kushibo connection. If only he'd also lived in Compton, then it would be like we're the same person, man.]

Kimo shows up at the Orange County Sheriff's Department to show he is alive and, apparently, will serve his time. Will Michael Jackson be far behind? (I must admit, I was sort of hoping the Gloved One had pulled a fast one.)

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