Monday, February 22, 2010
AES will bring crackdown to Vancouver
After suggestive pictures were posted online of half pipe snowboarding Olympic bronze medalist Scotty Lago being faux-llated™ by a young woman who may possibly be of Korean descent, Anti-English Spectrum founder and bad foreigner eradication crusader Yie Eun-woong announced he would take his fight on the road to Vancouver, Canada, site of the Winter Olympics that were stolen from Pyongchang.
"We must do whatever we can to rid British Columbia of illegal, low-quality English teachers," said Mr Yie in a cell phone interview he conducted from his koshiwon. I will go to Canada and follow these prospective teachers to determine if they are in the country illegally and what brand of condoms they are throwing away."
Mr Lago's agent said the manhunt was ridiculous. "Mr Yie has no jurisdiction here and no business conducting a manhunt against Scott, because there's no way he would ever end up being an English teacher for anybody in Korea," he said. "Unless the Pepsi endorsement deal falls through."
For his part, Lago went home to New Hampshire as soon as the photos were revealed on TMZ.com. "I don't think Mr Yie can find me here," he said by phone. "Seabrook is very hard for Koreans to pronounce."
The identity of the bronze biter has not been established — early reports said it was Michelle Kwan, Kristi Yamaguchi, or possibly Connie Chung — but one reporter spotted the incognympho™ in the hallway in front of Mr Lago's hotel room about an hour later. With a disappointed look on her face, all she had to say was, "half a pipe is right."